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Why My Husband Puts Up With Me, I’ll Never Know

So, we’re going to have to talk about this whole AGE thing pretty soon.  Not today, because I am too tired to think too hard about it.  That being said, I can only blame age for what has been happening to my memory.  And the ability to find things.  And the general scatter-brained-ness that I currently exhibit.

It always seems to negatively affect my husband too.  Somehow, he’s always caught in the middle of it.  I typically secretly-in-my-head blame him for moving the missing object or not putting something back in its proper place. Because, I mean, it just couldn’t be MY fault!  That is, until I find it right where I left it, of course…

Take yesterday for example.  Yesterday provided two perfect examples of just the thing I’m talking about.    One thing to note before we get started – Sunday night, we were out and about running errands.  Daniel had been driving my car.  He has learned to put my car keys in the OUTSIDE pocket of my purse.  Otherwise, all Hell breaks loose the next time I go to drive my car.

That brings us to Monday morning.  As you all know (and are all experiencing yourselves by now, I’m sure), by this point in the school year, we are BARELY scraping by to get out of the house on time.  Daniel, being the wonderful husband that he is, helps me get the girls loaded in the car each morning.  Yesterday was no exception.  As he buckled the girls in, I got settled in the driver’s seat.  Once my coffee was readily available in its cup holder (really, the most important part of the morning drive), I reached into that key-pocket in my purse.  No keys.

We were now at T-minus-not-enough-time-to-get-the-girls-to-school-on-time.  The ensuing conversation went something like this:

Me: “Daniel, what did you do with my keys last night?”
Daniel: “I put them in your purse.  The OUTSIDE pocket of your purse.”
Me: “Well, they’re not there.”
Daniel: loud sigh
Me: “Are you SURE you put them there?” as I frantically dig through ALL pockets of my purse, panic ensuing
Daniel: “Yes, I KNOW I did.” as he heads to the elevator
Me: grumble, grumble, search through purse, search through car console, look in passenger seat
Daniel: loud stomping from upstairs, back and forth
Me: finally giving up, put my hands on the steering wheel and look directly at it, sighing

And there they were.  In.  The.  Ignition.  Right where I had put them when I first sat down in the car, out of habit, without thinking.  I just honked the horn and sat there ashamedly waiting for him to come back downstairs.

That was the longest elevator ride ever, and I wasn’t even on it.  He came into the garage, kissed both of the girls, kissed me and said goodbye, have a nice day, I love you.

He didn’t even GLOAT.  It was excruciating!

The day ended with us going on our annual Christmas shopping trip while my mom watched the girls.  I had somehow misplaced my favorite lip balm.  Y’all, it’s the best stuff EVER created.  I am completely addicted to it.  Just trust me on this one: Jack Black Intense Therapy Lip Balm.  And when I say misplaced, I mean I had it when I left work.  And couldn’t find it anywhere by the time I got home from yoga.  Thankfully, our first stop while shopping just happened to be where there was a Sephora.

After shopping with Daniel last night, I now have 5 Jack Black lip balms.  1 in the bathroom, 1 on my bedside table, 1 in my purse, 1 to carry around in my pocket.  And the 5th one?  Yeah, I found it this morning.

It was sitting in the console of the car.  Right where I had left it.

Poor Daniel.  I really hope no one tells him that it’s only going to get worse from here…

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